Humour, laughter lighten our burdens

They were not weeping and mourning, the usual behaviour anticipated at a funeral. Instead most had cloths around their necks resembling neck-ties. A few had books in their hands, a couple had pieces of chalk and one had a stick in her hand. In one way or the other each one of them was behaving as if they were a teacher either going to school, teaching or purporting to be maintaining discipline at school. Some even walked and talked with the same mannerism as that of the late uncle.
As we disembarked from the car, they all stood to attention as if to welcome very important guests. They greeted me as if I was a teacher and they were school pupils, or they were teachers and I was the headmaster coming to address them at a very important meeting.
It quickly dawned on me that they were imitating my uncle’s life as a school headmaster years back. What made the scene even more interesting was that they were doing it in such a way that would invoke memories and provoke laughter. Without actively thinking about it I burst out laughing. In an instant they had transformed the place replacing the palpable grief with humour and laughter. The whole atmosphere became lighter and bearable making communication easier and smooth.
Most people have often wondered why vanaSahwira and varoora take centre stage at funerals, with their joke-cracking, singing and dancing. It is because their role is to make the sad moments bearable and lighter.
The African culture with all its richness and diversity has for centuries helped grieving families cope better through the concept of Sahwira. As they go about their business of humour and laughter, the Sahwiras will ask for small tokens of appreciation from line relatives of the deceased. Even that practice is accepted as part of our culture.
At some point I was apprehensive about it like so many people who prefer that funerals be sombre, serious and solemn as a way of respecting the dead. With time this experience has helped me accept that it completely changes the perception and understanding of life, death and funerals.
While it is widely recognised that the death of a loved one is often one of the most painful experiences we go through, it must also be accepted that dealing properly with it will help shorten and smoothen the grieving process. When loved ones die we are often at a loss to express our emotions and heart-felt feelings. At the same time death often exposes us to our deep-seated fear of it. There however, is no need for funerals to be just solemn occasions devoid of smiling and laughter, which is why anaSahwira are important. They bring humour and laughter which is an essential part of life.
 Humour is fundamentally a way to release or save energy triggered by shock, repression, stress and pressure. Laughter, as most might know, is the best medicine. Some people do not seem to recognise it for the medicine that it is, seeing it rather as a plague. It helps relieve stress, lessens pain, and can often stop an argument in mid-sentence, especially if we make ourselves the object of a joke and members of the group agree with the assessment.
Bereavement and grief are very powerful emotions. Many of us have had the experience of the severe pain that comes from the loss of someone we love.
Laughter is a powerful antidote to stress, pain, and conflict. Nothing works faster or more dependably to bring our mind and body back into balance than a good laugh. Humour lightens our burdens, inspires hope, connects us to others, and keeps us grounded, focused, and alert.
With so much power to heal and renew, the ability to laugh easily and frequently is a tremendous resource for surmounting problems, enhancing our relationships, and supporting both physical and emotional health. Laughter is good for our health as it relaxes the whole body, relieving physical tension and stress, leaving our muscles relaxed. It boosts the immune system through reducing stress hormones and increasing immune cells and infection-fighting antibodies, thus improving our resistance to disease. Laughter triggers the release of the body’s natural feel-good chemicals, promoting an overall sense of well-being and can even temporarily relieve pain. In the process it improves the function of blood vessels and increases blood flow, which can help protect us against heart attacks and other cardiovascular problems.
It helps us keep a positive, optimistic outlook through difficult situations, disappointments, and loss.
More than just a respite from sadness and pain, laughter gives us the courage and strength to find new sources of meaning and hope. Even in the most difficult of times, a laugh, or a simple smile, can go a long way towards making us feel better. Laughter like a yawn is contagious, just hearing laughter primes our brain and readies us to smile and join in on the fun. We can not feel anxious, angry, or sad when we are laughing, allowing us to see situations in a more realistic, less threatening light.
Humour and playful communication strengthen our relationships by triggering positive feelings and fostering emotional connection.
When we laugh with one another, a positive bond is created. This bond acts as a strong buffer against stress, disagreements, and disappointment. Shared laughter is one of the most effective tools for keeping relationships fresh and exciting. All emotional sharing builds strong and lasting relationship bonds, but sharing laughter and play adds joy, vitality, and resilience. And humour is a powerful and effective way to heal resentments, disagreements, and hurts. Laughter unites people during difficult times.
The ability to laugh, play, and have fun with others not only makes life more enjoyable, it also helps us solve problems, connect with others, and be more creative. People who incorporate humour and play into their lives daily find that it renews them and all of their relationships. Life brings challenges that can either get the best of us or become playthings for our imagination. When we “become the problem” and take ourselves too seriously, it can be hard to think outside the box and find new solutions. But when we play with the problem, we often transform it into an opportunity for learning.
Playing with problems seems to come naturally to children. When they are confused or afraid, they make their problems into a game, giving them a sense of control and an opportunity to experiment with new solutions. Interacting with others in playful ways helps retain this creative ability. Indeed the role of Sahwira is important in all situations even at funerals. When Sahwira is in the house humour is nigh and play begins.
Let Sahwira help you laugh and play this festive season, Merry Christmas to you all.

– Philip Mataranyika is the CEO of Nyaradzo Funeral Assurance Company. He can be contacted on: mavmat67@hotmail.com